My life didn’t serve any purpose. That would’ve been okay if at least I enjoyed it, but I didn’t. In spite of the fact (or probably because of the fact) that I mostly cared about myself, I wasn’t happy. I was never satisfied with anything, meaning my life was a constant waiting for things to become better. I didn’t know what would make me happy, so I looked outwards for a cure to my dissatisfaction.
It took years before I recognised the futility of my efforts. I eventually came to understand that happiness, satisfaction and rapture come from within. They aren’t obtained through experiences or reaching goals, but rather from having the right perspective. Or, to put it differently, love and joy do not spontaneously arise when you do a particular activity. Rather, if you have a loving and joyous attitude, you will have plenty of lovely experiences.
We can change our perspective through conscious effort. I strongly wish to give everyone access to the guidance and inspiration they need to do so; to live a meaningful and fulfilling life. That’s what I’m trying to do with this website.
Failing to become who you want to become is to deny the world all that you have to offer: Your gifts, your story, your love, your potential. To improve for one’s own sake is common sense, and to improve for other’s sake is our duty. Our purpose is to always evolve and become a little better, stronger, wiser, gentler, or more helpful than the day before.
Albeit not in all areas of life, I generally find simplicity and self-reliance to be ideals worth striving for. This also applies to self-improvement. While attending university I took some courses in psychology. Some of what I learned was undoubtedly useful and enlightening. However, I often found that the theories were either 1) turning the somewhat simple into something unnecessarily complex, making it impractical or unclear for the average person; 2) intended specifically for people with mental illnesses, traumas or depression; or 3) inapplicable without a trained psychologist, psychotherapist or psychoanalyst to guide the patient through their challenges.
And yet, it wouldn’t be completely inaccurate to say that I’m trying to cure sorts of mental illnesses. Many of us are convinced that we aren’t good enough unless we are physically attractive, famous, influential or rich, and that happiness is found in possessions. We have a distorted perspective of each other and ourselves. People feel more stressed, depressed, anxious and lonelier than ever before.
So while I wholeheartedly respect and salute people who find help from psychologists, I also find that there is a vacuum of inspiration and guidance aimed at the average person who doesn’t necessarily suffer from mental trauma, but who is nevertheless disappointed with life, with him or herself, who lacks purpose, or needs to know that there are other values to live by than those proposed by modern society.
So I started studying again – sociology this time. Where do our values and beliefs come from? Are these culturally accepted values and beliefs actually healthy for us? By what means does society try to make us stick to the given norms? Of course, this doesn’t mean I’m abandoning the psychological at all. But I think these are the types of questions we need to answer if we wish to understand and change the bigger reason for our dissatisfaction.
I hope that my writings can serve as a lighthouse of clarity in a confusing world, and that they can inspire you to be better to yourself, to your loved ones and to everyone else.